If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the volume of parenting advice regularly thrown at parents, we definitely understand. Over the last two decades, the self-help category (parenting being one of those categories) is one of the fastest-growing nonfiction categories in the world, grossing $42 billion in 2023 alone.
Parents used to be worried about soothing a colicky baby or getting kids to sleep easier or faster, but these types of concerns have slowly been eclipsed by parents seeking advice on how to parent children with complicated behavioral and neurological disorders, like ADHD, depression, or anxiety.
This market’s rapid and sustained growth tells us that, firstly, you’re not alone.
Many parents face these more complex problems and seek help and support to understand and raise healthy adults. And it doesn’t help that the world continues to grow more complicated as time marches on. It’s ironic that today’s young adults are the most tech-savvy of any generation, yet they increasingly seem to struggle to make the transition into adulthood.
LEARN MORE: Parenting A Struggling Teen: Resource For Parents
The fact that this phenomenon is so common does not help make things any easier. You may be at your wit’s end and scared about what the future holds for your child, but we’re here to tell you that you can succeed and your child can thrive, especially if a parent employs positive parenting techniques.
This article explores some of our best positive parenting tips for you to use with your child today. They are simple and effective and can help you build a nurturing relationship with your young adult or heal a struggling one.
It all starts with building open and effective communication with your child. This is the key to the positive parenting model that will lead to eventual success.
Building Open and Effective Communication
Establishing open, honest, and respectful communication is the key to parenting a teen. Effective communication consists of three essential elements: empathy, active listening, and open dialogue.
Parenting Tip #1: Use Empathy
This is where you get to understand your teen’s world! Get into their shoes and walk a mile or two. Those Nikes might feel a little bit snug and trendy to you, but get into them and walk around a bit. You might be surprised by what you learn about how your child sees the world. This perspective is incredibly valuable, to get it, all you have to do is listen and be open to their worldview.
Parenting Tip #2: Try Active Listening
Active listening requires you to be fully engaged when your teen is talking. At this point, just listen with the intent to understand how your child feels and the impetus for those feelings rather than listening to respond. Active listening includes asking discovery questions such as, “How did you feel?” or “What did you think?”
Parenting Tip #3: Use Open Dialogue
If you shy away from conflict, the best parenting advice we can give is to be direct but keep your language kind and body language open and relaxed. Address problems head-on by getting right to the point. A frank, respectful discussion where both parties can speak freely and honestly about a problem creates mutually rewarding relationships, even when difficult conversations occur. You might try to start the conversation by saying, “I have something I’d like to discuss with you, but first, I’d like to get your point of view,” or “I need your help with something. Can we talk about it?” And then listen! Too often, when the other party is talking, we think about our response when we should listen instead.
DISCOVER: Helicopter Parenting: What It Is and How Can You Stop It
11 Tips To Parent Your Teen Into A Successful Adult
Parents strive to do their best to nurture and guide their children through each stage of their lives. However, it’s not always a smooth and easy path. As they grow and develop, there are times when our kids display undesirable or unexplainable behavior—and we don’t always know how to help them when they struggle.
While these parenting pains can be frustrating, positive parenting skills can help you stay calm and focused as you work together to achieve acceptable behavior. We cannot overstate the role of proactive and positive parenting when it comes to shaping young adult success–there is a strong link between positive parenting styles and the development of an adolescent’s self-esteem. How you choose to parent can and does have a far-reaching effect.
If you’re looking to make a positive impact, consider implementing one or two of these simple positive parenting skills for teens:
1. Show Physical Affection
It seems simple, but most children crave physical affection like hugs or even a pat on the shoulder. If they aren’t overly affectionate, that’s okay. Show them love in the ways that make them feel the most nurtured and comforted.
2. Use Open Communication
Your words may be one of the most important tools in your arsenal. How you talk to your children will influence how they talk to others and even how they will talk to their own children someday. Use words that are calming and nonjudgmental. Try to have an open mind; your child may have different ideas about the world, and that’s okay.
3. Practice Active Listening
It goes without saying that if you don’t know what your child is thinking, you’ll lose your ability to influence the outcome. Just listen and restate what your child says. This will show that you are really listening. Many parents only listen long enough to start thinking about their own responses. Your job here is not to argue or convince but to truly understand what your child is thinking and feeling.
4. Develop Emotional Intelligence
Emotional intelligence, often referred to as emotional awareness, is your ability to control and manage your emotions. We know that emotions sometimes run high, but it’s important to work on staying calm and in control of your emotions. If your child misbehaves or throws attitude your way, don’t react. Stay calm and give them clear instructions on what you would like them to do instead. Don’t react to their negative behavior; instead, encourage the behavior you want to see.
5. Encourage Independence
Taking a step into the adult world means understanding and managing personal finances and taking responsibility for yourself. Teach your child the basics of using a budget and managing money. Use scaffolding to support them as they grow in their ability to manage their schedules and finances. Often, the way we treat our children sends a nonverbal message that they aren’t capable of doing things on their own. Make sure your young adult knows that you believe they can do adult things.
6. Get Them Active!
Physical exercise can be the first step to curing a multitude of mental health problems. Get your teen back into nature, enjoying wholesome recreational activities. A healthy body is an active body.
7. Embrace Experiential Learning
It never hurts to be exposed to a different worldview. Look for opportunities to help others in your community that are different from your family economically and culturally. Gap years and different types of cultural experiential learning programs are great ways to get your child thinking about a world outside of himself and broaden his worldview.
8. Establish Boundaries
Sit down and have a family discussion on the family rules in your home. Write the rules down and have them displayed prominently in your home. Likewise, the consequences for breaking rules should also be clearly defined. Rules should be few, fair, easy to follow, enforceable, and positively stated (e.g., write what they should do).
9. Support Academics
School is an important part of any adolescent’s life. Encourage your child’s best efforts, but don’t be afraid to step in if they need accommodations or support. The most important part of learning is developing a sense of curiosity about the world. Help them find areas of learning that they are talented in, excel at, or simply enjoy. Now is the time to try new things! Look into sports, art, robotics, etc. Anything is fair game!
10. Parent By Example
Your child is watching you every second and learning from you whether you intend to teach them or not. Your guidance will ring true if you practice what you preach.
11. Never Give Up
With proper support, even the most troublesome teens can become amazing people. Today is not forever. Cultivate a growth mindset in yourself, which will likely transfer to your child. People grow and change over time, and your child will, too.
TRENDING: Three Parenting Styles That Will Wreck Your Teen’s Future
Planting Seeds of Success: Cultivate Growth through Positive Parenting
Parenting is not for the faint of heart. We know you care deeply about your child and their perspective and want to see them thriving. Positive parenting can do wonders for planting the seeds for success early in life. As you work together, you can overcome most challenges.
Because we know that parents are doing all they can, our heart goes out to families that continue to struggle to get their young adults to transition successfully from home life to adulthood. You’re not alone in this struggle. Pure Life Adventure has developed a program that specifically uses a hands-on, strengths-based, student-integrated clinical model where participants quickly learn new, healthy coping strategies, behavioral and emotional regulation skills, leadership skills, and life skills that lead to future success. We often see new skills and talents transfer to life at home and beyond.
If you’re looking for a way to help your child and you’re feeling a bit stuck, consider reaching out for a consultation. You can also spend a half hour perusing the resources we’ve created just for you.
Positive parenting can get the ball rolling in the right direction, but sometimes, you need more support and clinical expertise. That’s where we can assist. Contact us today to discuss how we can help.
